Godspeed, Jimmy.........

Today, I paid my respects to the family of a favorite cousin of my parents. 

From Mom's archives:  Jimmy, Uncle Henry, Uncle George, and Mom, circa 1925.

His name was Jimmy, and he is responsible for the existence of my sisters and I. Relax, there is no controversy, no scandal, only another plot on the timeline of my family history that has been revisited with the passing of time...and yet another family member.  

When the news of Jimmy's passing came last week, I was reminded, after talking to family members who were close to him in his younger years, that not only was he my mother's first cousin, but he was also one of my father's best buddies in their pre-World War II later teen years. Within weeks of my paternal grandmother's unexpected passing in 1941, my grieving father was introduced to my mother by Jimmy.  My parents' relationship resulted in marriage, and four children.  

Another from Mom's archives: Jimmy, Carmela, Mom and Dad, circa 1946.

My parents' relationship with Jimmy, and all the cousins of his generation and their spouses, was lifelong and heartfelt, and their regard for their extended families was unmistakable.  

Yet another from the archives: Mom, Dad, Anita, Wally, Jim, and Carmela, circa 1947.

I can remember the stories of the cousins all living within walking distance of each other throughout their younger years, and only a short drive from each other during their young married days. With each of the events like today, the folks of my generation and the one preceding it all express their disappointment in today's 'way of the world', and the significance of funerals as the only chance for meetings of all these fine folks.  Today, I must concur that they are correct. Most of the family members I saw today, I last saw at my mother's funeral two years ago, and my sister's funeral two years before that.  

My personal recollection of Jimmy was that he was a family man, very active athletically, and always smiling. Maybe it was Jimmy's doing that on my way back to work after visiting his family, my cellphone rang.  It was a funeral home...not the one that arranged Jimmy's celebration, but the one that arranged my mother's some twenty-two months ago.  The conversation went something like this:

Woman:    Hello, is this Joseph?

Me:   Yes it is.

Woman:  Hi, Joseph, this is _________ from ________ Funeral Home calling.  How are you today?

Me:    Fine.

Woman:    Great, We're just calling to see if you'd like to schedule an appointment to come in and discuss your wishes for prearranging your funeral with a member of our staff.

LONG PAUSE..........

Me:    I don't think so!

At first I was taken aback.  I don't really think Jimmy had a hand in this coincidence, but I'd like to think that Jimmy, Mom, Dad, and everyone else up there got a chuckle out of my "What the ______?" moment.

I do sometimes wish we lived in a simpler world in which distance and obligations would stop preventing family reunions that didn't involve funerals.  I wish that death and sickness didn't have to be such a big factor in life.  I wish that all in the family could know that, despite the distance and the obligations, good thoughts are with them as we once again go our separate ways.  Maybe our next time together will be a happy one.

Godspeed, Jimmy: thanks for getting the folks together in the first place and being such a special part of their lives. Peace to you and all of yours.........