My Thirty Days of Thanks....DAY 16: CRANKS, PRANKS, BLANKS, AND THANKS

Day 16:  CRANKS, PRANKS, BLANKS, AND THANKS

CRANKS:  This morning, I forgot my work ID with my fob attached, and needed to rely on a coworker to enter the building.  I forgot to shave, so I survived the day with no cuts and no makeup, but looked real scruffy.  I forgot to take my pill, so I had palpitations, my stomach felt funny, I had a headache, I was cranky, I didn't feel like doing anything, AND I thought you were all out to get me!  When I got to work and had been talking with my coworkers for a few minutes, I suddenly began having to adjust my collar on my mock turtle neck shirt. Upon further investigation I noticed that the tag was right smack in the middle of my Adam's apple and taking my breath away.  Rather than follow my friends' suggestion and go to the back of the room and turn my shirt around, I went to the men's restroom to fix it, and announced without pressing my censor button that there was a 90 % chance I'd have to use the room for other purposes when I got there anyway, so it'd be worth it. Those odds were right on!


   

The new student in our rodent friendly classroom
Photo courtesy of Ms. R.

PRANKS:  This  afternoon, I went to my fourth grade class...the one where, just a few days before, I removed a deceased, trapped  rodent that had made the room uninhabitable.  When I arrived, all the students, the teacher, the student teacher, and my fellow reading assistant were giggling.  I proceeded about my business and began checking homework, and the giggles grew into guffaws.  I probably blushed a little, and giggled a little while pretending that I knew what everyone else was so happy about, then realized that, somehow, I was the target of a yet unrealized practical joke.  I made eye contact with my coworker and asked discreetly, "Is my zipper down?"  Well, apparently I wasn't as discreet as I thought, because everyone was out of control, and it wasn't even Thrilling Thursday!  Finally, one of the adults asked me if I was ready to meet my new student. My body language at that time said, "I guess so," but my mind said, "What is wrong with these people?"  Finally, I looked at my work table, which I had closely passed several times, and not acknowledged.  There, in one of the student's chairs was a huge, black rodent in need of a visit to the orthodontist. He had a sign attached to him saying that our class was rodent friendly and that there was always room for one more!   Finally, the cat, or in this case, the rat, was out of the bag, and I was happy that this creature didn't reek, and wouldn't need to be carried to a remote location for disposal; that I could finally begin the tasks at hand without having a whole classroom of kids and adults laughing uncontrollably for my benefit;  and most of all, that my zipper was indeed up!

BLANKS:  My wife and I had had our dinner schedule compromised this week with functions keeping us in separate locations on both Wednesday and Thursday.  I announced to her that I'd cook the roast chicken for our Friday dinner for two since I get home before she does.  So, I came home and cleaned that sucker, inside and out, and read on the package that he'd have to be in the oven approximately 25 minutes per pound.  My usually mathematical mind was drawing a blank as to the total time required to cook him, but soon I had figured that 4 times 25 % = 1 hour, and the beast was 5 pounds, so he would need 1 hour and 15 minutes.  So, at 4:30, the dinner was on its way to being edible!  When Jackie got home around 5:30, I explained my logic about the cooking time and her instantaneous, matter of fact response was, "So it's got another hour and a half to go."  I stared at her, knowing she was having one of those "You've done it again" moments.  After about 7 and a half seconds of staring and thinking, I gasped and sighed.  My mathematical brain had a momentary toot, and our already famished tummies just couldn't wait that long for the feast. So, we put everything on hold and went to our favorite buffet and stuffed ourselves silly.

THANKS:  For Day 16, because each faux pas resulted in a smile or a laugh, and I'm thankful for both of those....and Day 17 has NO choice but to be better!